....

Out of the apartment, in the mom's house.
Sold car, riding bus.
No more hangers, just a suitcase.

The journey has already started.

The First of Lasts......

Friday was my last official day with Gabe. It was far different than any other last day on the job I have experienced, naturally. It doesn't feel like work with him, just another extension of my life. In so many ways he feels like my own child.

Anticipating the end of the day was far more emotional than when it actually arrived. We spent some of the day packing up his belongings which I think was very good for him. It helps give him the idea that this day was different. It isn't everyday that we send off all his things. In the end, I don't know if he really got what was happening, but I am glad that I communicated with him and gave him a chance to understand. When the packing was done we went out for a celebratory ice cream.

This whole process has been, and continues to be a lesson in loving without attachment. Loving and letting go.

I have been very lucky to be in Gabe life for his first two years. I feel like I have taught and showed him a lot. Mostly about love, patience, creativity, and honesty. And he has taught me about those things in turn.

So, thank you little one, for being the best kind of friend I could have. It has been fun and adventurous and I will always have you in my heart.

BBL (Big Birthday Love)

Hooray for Megan!

This is a day to celebrate.

Megan,

Thank you for your presence and love. Without which I believe I would be in an entirely different place. Your cheers and guidance have helped me find and live the life I love. When I think of you I see vibrance, play, Big love, and joy. I hope you have another 'Best Year Ever.'

Much Love,

A (B)

Disappointed

Getting ready to go swimming and I wake up to this...

SLC Match

So....the big day is upon us. Allison finds out today that she is officially coming back to Salt Lake. At least everyone in the voting pool thinks that is how todays events are going to turn out.

Allie, I think you are going to be such a wonderful doctor (yeah, they're really going to let you be one). All the qualities that continually renew you as my NBFF are what proves it. Your big heart and thoughtfulness, your careful listening, and your genuineness. I LOVE you...oh my, it's true.

Good luck today. Know that I am with you celebrating.....

Haven't seen it?

You should. An amazing speech regardless of your politics or views. It needs to be said and he does it eloquently. Pass it on.

My Little Memoir

So I was challenged, invited, called out by Phoenix Touch to write a six word, or less, memoir.

The "rules"
1. Write your own six-word memoir.
2. Post it on your blog and include a visual illustration if you’d like.
3. Link to the person that tagged you in your post and to this original post if possible so we can track it as it travels across the blogosphere.
4. Tag five more blogs with links.
5. And don’t forget to leave a comment on the tagged blogs with an invitation to play. (This last step is optional.)


Facing fear, she takes flight.

There you have it. I am tagging Allie, Chelsee, and Kaeloy.

Song for You: Boss Hog

This is my go to spring album. When the weather is finally warm enough to roll down a window there is nothing like this music to drive along with. It has been a springtime staple since the year 2000.


Itchy and Scratchy
Whiteout
Boss Hog

Aftermath

I am surprised that I feel so sane right now. I have been thinking about this day, losing sleep over this day, for weeks. The anticipation of letting go was more difficult than the actual process. What helped was that so many friends came and hung out with me throughout the day. In fact it was harder to see them leave than my favorite super comfy robe. I also love that so many of the ones I love have something of mine. Everything went to lovely homes.



Aside from friends I totally appreciated all the strangers who came to look through stuff. My old friend from high school was randomly there and a crazy lady paid me almost $10.00 is crusty, lint-y change. Gross. I also learned about a totally cool project that my market umbrella is getting worked in to.



I think that maybe it is time to stop worrying about the financial part of this trip. The universe seems to be showing me that I am going to be just fine. I sold my car, for the asking price, first thing this morning. Everything that didn't sell today fit in my car for one short trip to the DI.



Sitting in this messy apartment I don't feel like anything is missing. I, surprisingly, still feel at Home. Now just to make it look like more than a dump.....

New Cameras

I have always loved taking photos and am just now deciding that I would like to play more with photography. Of course, that never looks like taking a real class but going out and playing around, intuitively finding what I like and works, and what doesn't. I recently purchased a Diana+ camera which I am totally excited about. A reproduction of a classic plastic toy camera from the 60's, it takes beautifully unexpected photos. I have taken three rolls of film but haven't got them developed yet. I will surely share when I do.


These photos are all from the first roll of film I took with Justin's 35mm SLR. I am considering buying it so took it out on a test run at Project 337, around the city, and indoors with Gabe. Because I know little about the technical aspects of photography they were all taken with the automatic settings on the camera. I would really love to learn more and play with it. The shots are grainy, something I am not used to with digital shots. I sdon't know if it is because I got it developed at Walgreens, the speed of the film, or what. Maybe if they were printed they wouldn't be grainy. I do think that I know how to set up a shot relatively well. So what do you think? Should I get the camera? If you have an opinion on the matter let me know by commenting.

Scanned over

Soooo tired from scanning hundreds of photos and staring at the computer screen. Must sleep. I don't know how people work in an office every day, I would go mad.